Thursday, September 11, 2008

Wednesday was another one of the worst days in my life ever.

Once again, I was moody and feeling terrible. I spoke to Mr Wu over the phone and unfortunately, I headed for a disappointment. He sensed something wrong; there was something wrong but I just didn't feel like telling him then. When I wanted to tell him on MSN what went wrong during the phone conversation; MSN had problems and I was logged out. The next thing I know was, the message did not get sent over. It was what I wanted to tell him.

I am neglected. My feelings are neglected.

I am cantankerous. How long will this last? I have no answer.

It was another rough day at work again. I thought I almost broke down at work. Perhaps I broke down at work unknowingly. I doubt the people around me noticed anyway. I heard that M.T would be meeting some of the colleagues for lunch later on. Well, I was invited to join in. I rejected because I didn't feel up to it. I developed some skepticism about the lunch appointment. I know that if I had agreed to it, I will be not myself. Sometimes, I get tired of passing off as a social butterfly.

All these negative thoughts certainly do not help to boost my mood.

As I type this entry ... " I sit alone at home and cry over you... what can I do? "