I sat down with my manager to discuss the future business objectives she has set for me today. I was so badly affected after the discussion... and I felt totally disappointed with how the arrangement turned out to be. I know that I will be stuck with this role for the rest of my stay in the team... this was not something I wanted and expected. As much as she tried to convince me that there would be a chance for me to take on the trade support role, I felt pessimistic about it still. It just couldn't be helped. I've been advised to move out of the reconciliation as soon as I could because it does not add value at all. Somewhat, I began to see some truth in it.
What really made me sad was she chose the new joiner (who joined the team later than I did) who is currently sharing the reconciliation to move on to the trade support role. When she told me that, I was so certain that disappointment was smeared all over my face. She could tell..and she asked if I was alright with the arrangement. Well, even if I was not, what more can she do to make it better? She explained that he had more experience compared to a fresh grad like me... and which was why he was picked to learn on the trade support role first. Well, that was not the end. On further discussion, the way she answered my questions sort of indicated that... I will be stuck with this for good.
I have no idea what I could except to perform exceptionally well on this role to show her my worth. With this, I am not hoping to get anything in return... but I just want to show her that I have some value! It does affect me badly but .... it also pushes me to work harder. I was so unmotivated to work after the discussion... But I have to walk on!
Thanks to yx and my sister...I spoke to them on this and their words soothed my heart a little. Of course, Mr Wu too! The lunch with him made me feel better :) Hehe, let's hope we won't bump into your managers again , LOL!
I can't wait for the weekend to come after the unfairness I had at work! Perhaps I should start planning for the weekend... so that it'd come quickly! It 'll be Valentine's Day this Saturday and my mom's birthday this Sunday! I've been thinking to get a laptop for sometime... maybe I'll take a look this weekend with my mom and sister. I haven't felt happy for a long time.. I don't know why but maybe buying something for myself will cheer me up?
Anyway, it's time to get a new laptop. It's just a matter of whether I am willing to spend the money on this.
